The other day someone told me, "Your dog is sooooo spoiled." I sheepishly agreed.

That got me thinking. Not so many years ago it was thought that open displays of affection to a child would spoil him. Children were to be "seen and not heard." Harsh treatment was considered necessary and normal, as in "spare the rod and spoil the child." Parents were obliged to do little more than provide food and shelter for their children. Children were valued according to their utility to the family. Boys had more value than girls. The strong were worth more than the weak.

As civilizations progress beyond their basic survival needs, higher values emerge. It is a recent idea that children have inherent value and need much more than just food and shelter in order to fulfill their potential. Indeed, we believe that they deserve more. They deserve love, education, decent health care, and more. These things do not spoil a child.

I suspect that a similar evolution is underway with regard to our pets.

By providing food and shelter most people believe they are giving a dog a good home. In return, the dog is expected to protect the family (or territory) and be a faithful companion. He must never ever mess in the house, chew things that belong to the people, bite anyone or run away. He should seldom bark. This is the contract: food and shelter for perfect behavior. If the dog breaks it, he will be severely punished, forever banished to the back yard or taken to a shelter where he will probably die.

Careful study of animals has taught us that they, too, need more than food and shelter to develop normally and fulfill their potential. They, too, need love, decent health care, and education. These things will no more spoil a pet than they will a child.

Children and dogs both thrive on training and education. Both want to please their parents/masters and will work harder for love than for treats. They learn most quickly when taught what to do, rather than what not to do. Beat a dog for chewing your slippers and he will become a fearful dog who chews slippers only when you are not around. Give a dog his own chew toy and remind him to use it when he goes for your slippers and you will have a happy dog who learns that toys are OK to chew and slippers are not.

Though she is only a puppy, my dog knows she must sit before I give her a meal and come promptly when I call her. She has learned to ring a bell when she needs to go outside and do her business. She knows the difference between her chew toys and my slippers and she's happy to sleep quietly in her crate all night. I am the center of her universe. Yes, I do my best to give her everything: nutritious food, warm shelter, medicine when she's sick, consistent training, plenty of walks on the beach, and lots of love. She gives me more.

If anyone is spoiled, it is me!